She was vaguely aware she was dreaming, Allura standing detached from the images that flashed through her mind. She couldn’t affect what was happening, she could only watch, a ghostly visitor to scenes that felt as though they should be familiar. If she was fully awake, some of what she dreamed would make her blush, Allura getting an eyeful of steamy sex, the kind that was considered too hot for the regular holo channels.
Even more startling was to see herself as a participant to the love making, Allura’s body entwined with another’s, a man she would recognize anywhere by his handsome good looks, and exotic alien features. She tried not to dwell on the sex, memories flashing, changing before her. She’d start out in one position, and end up in another, Lotor seemed to hold an extensive knowledge of ways to contort their bodies to bring them the maximum amount of pleasure. Allura was amazed, not even realizing her body could bend in such a way, and she thought furiously that this explained why she had been so sore the day after her wedding night.
In between brief visions of sex, were short flashes of them laughing, fully dressed and exchanging sloppy kisses. She could see them sharing a bottle, each eagerly guzzling down their drink, and stumbling as they walked. They leaned heavily on each other, Lotor and Allura somehow managing to remain up right. She saw them pass out a door, stepping into the crowded streets of Las Tibayas.
A sign hung over the door, flashing neon lights advertising something. Allura tried to read it, making out words, lips forming syllables as she muttered out loud. “Alabaster.” It was an odd name for a building, not giving any clue towards the nature of the establishment inside. But Allura knew, without a doubt, that it was what her Nanny referred to in less than polite terms, a gentleman’s club.
She didn’t have time to wonder how she knew, the scene had changed again, showing another passion fueled moment between herself and her husband. They were fitted in a tiny space, Lotor having to hunch over so as not to bump his head against the ceiling. Allura’s back was pressed against shelves, each one holding various cleaning products, and a broom lay lopsided against the wall.
Lotor was supporting her off the floor, her legs wrapped tight around his waist, Allura’s one hand gripping the back of his neck. The other was bent behind her, holding on to the topmost shelf. Her dress has been shoved up, panties crumpled on the floor, a vivid pink that stood out against the darkness of the closet. She was moaning, loud and without end, uncaring if anyone heard them. Allura was dismayed to see how shameless she was being, moving her hips almost as frantically as Lotor moved his, Allura too drunk to even take note of the pain that was associated with the losing of one’s virginity.
The scene changed again, Allura recognizing the minister from Romelle’s rehearsal. She and Lotor stood before him, clasping both hands together, staring dreamily in each other’s eyes. They barely heard what the minister was saying, needing to be prompted several times before they could remember to say their vows. They hadn’t even waited for the minister to finish speaking, falling onto each other as the first hint of “You may now kiss the bride.”
From the way they had at each other, feasting hungrily on each other’s lips, Allura wasn’t surprised they hadn’t waited to get to a hotel room. Ghostlike, she followed their stumbling down the aisle, wondering what else she would see. Another flash, another half memory, Lotor practically ravishing Allura in an elevator. She was dressed differently from the other memories, clad in a pink sun dress that was riding up her thighs. It would take her a while yet to realize she was now experiencing a new day’s worth of memories, Allura’s mind jumping around, showing them dancing and eating, and most of all, the marathon hours of sex they had had.
With a start she lurched up to a sitting position, finding she was sweating, her body badly aroused from the memories she had seen. Allura had seconds to wonder why she had awakened so suddenly, and then she heard it, male voices out in the hall, not even trying to be quiet as they argued. She frowned, recognizing the voices to be that of Lotor and Keith’s, the two males yet again at each other’s throats. And from the sound of things, their reason for discontent was her.
Allura knew she needed to get out there, and break up the argument before it escalated to physical violence. She was already moving, sliding across the bed, and taking the sheets with her. She knew that she was naked, and though she was dismayed, she wasn’t as surprised as she could have been, Allura realizing with a moan she had done something foolish.
If she had any doubts about just what she had done with Lotor, they vanished when she tried to stand. Allura dropping back to the bed with a wince, noting how sore she was, and how shaky her legs felt. If possible, it was even worse than the aches and pain she had experienced in the aftermath of her wedding night, Allura realizing Lotor had been overzealous in showing his affection for her.
She’d have to speak to him about that, the thought making her frown. Why was she thinking as though there would be a repeat performance of the sex?! ~Because you’re married to him silly. It’s a husband and wife’s duty to please one another.~ Allura sighed, and made another attempt to stand, this time prepared for the pain. She tugged the bed sheet off the mattress, wrapping it around her naked body.
She looked around, seeing clothing laying discarded on the floor. The room was a mess, pillows on the floor, and a chair was overturned, leaving Allura to wonder how it had happened. She spotted her sun dress, and inched towards it, bending down carefully to snag it’s straps. Lotor and Keith were still arguing, and she hurried to pull the dress on, not wanting to appear before them clad only in the bed sheet.
It’d be even better if she could find her underwear, but Allura settled for just the dress, padding barefoot towards the door which was opened just a crack. Lotor’s back was to it, the prince wearing a short robe that showed off his legs. Keith hadn’t noticed her presence at the door, glaring angrily at Lotor, his hands clenched into fists. He was still dressed in the clothing he had worn to the wedding rehearsal, leaving Allura to realize it was still the same day.
“You had no right Lotor, no right!” Keith was saying, eyes more angry than she had ever seen.
“No right?” Lotor questioned, his tone disbelieving. “Have you already forgotten captain? Allura is my wife. That gives me every right to spend time with her.”
“We’re talking about more than just spending time with her!” Keith snapped out, thrusting a finger in Lotor’s face. “It’s about stalking and blackmail, and forcing yourself on her!”
“Forcing myself?” Lotor snorted, and knocked Keith’s hand away from his face. “As shocking as it may be, I did no such thing. The princess wanted my attentions. She was the one who initiated everything. I merely did my husbandly duty to oblige and please her.”
“Like I would believe that!” Keith retorted, shoving his finger right back in Lotor’s face. The prince let out a warning growl, Allura taking that as her cue to open the door. Keith glanced in her direction, eyes doing a quick once over of her body. She wondered if he could tell she wore nothing beneath her dress, Allura trying not to color under his close scrutiny.
“I think we can get the full story from Allura.” Lotor said, turning so he could watch both her and Keith. “Allura beloved, did I at any point last night force my affections on you?”
They were both staring at her, Lotor’s gaze level, Keith practically begging her to tell him different. She fidgeted, not sure what to say, hating that they had put her in this position.
“Allura?” Lotor’s voice, the prince gently prodding her to speak.
“He didn’t force me Keith.” She said at last, memories of the night before playing in her mind. She was as shocked as Keith was dismayed, Allura wondering why she had acted the way she had.
“You’re lying.” Keith said after a moment’s pause. He was shaking his head, staring horrified at her.
“No, Keith, I’m sorry….I’m not.” Allura gave in to the blush, feeling the heat flood her face. “I..” She lowered her eyes, wondering how she could explain. “I let him…” She trailed off, realizing it was more than just letting Lotor do those things to her. She had encouraged him, hell she had practically taken him by the hand and shown him what she wanted him to do to her. It was so out of character for her, and she felt ready to die of mortification as Allura thought of some of the things she had told him, and the bold way she had acted.
“It can’t be the truth…” Keith’s voice was low, he was trying to catch her eyes, as though looking into them would reveal a different story from the one she was telling him. “What has he got over you?”
“What?” She looked up confused.
“What is he threatening you with now?” Keith asked, fixing Lotor with a vicious glare.
“Is it so hard to believe that my wife would want to be with me?” demanded Lotor, crossing his arms over his chest.
“Yes!” Keith was rude and blunt, hissing out words. “You had to force her to leave the rehearsal with you.”
“I did no such thing!” protested Lotor, glowering at Keith.
“You knew she’d want to keep her cousin happy! A happiness you endangered with your very presence.” Keith pointed out. “Allura only left with you so you wouldn’t further disrupt the rehearsal. Allura please….I won’t judge. What did he blackmail you with to get you to have…” He lowered his voice, as though suddenly conscious of being over heard. “Have sex with him?”
“Nothing!” She exclaimed, wishing she could keep her voice down lower. But her agitation made it come out loud, Allura annoyed with Lotor, with Keith, and mostly with herself. “I slept with him….and I have no one to blame but myself.”
“There you have it captain.” Lotor smirked, moving to stand closer to Allura. She didn’t try to resist as he draped a possessive arm over her shoulders, Allura just staring at Keith.
“How could you?” The captain demanded, looking at her as though she was someone he didn’t recognize. Allura shrugged, not knowing what to say to him. It wasn’t as though there was some magic words that could make it all better for Keith to hear. “Do you even want to get away from him?!”
“Keith…..he’s my husband now….” sighed Allura.
“And so that changes everything does it?” Keith had his hands on his hips, Allura astonished to see him aim his glare at her.
“In a way it does…” Her tone was weary, Allura not wanting to argue with him.
“I don’t know what happened…” Keith began, and he looked away from her. “But Lotor, this I swear, if I find out you had something to do with manipulating her into this…”
“You’ll what?” Lotor demanded, a sneer curling his lips. Keith didn’t respond, and Lotor’s sneer grew even more impressive. “I’ll tell you. You’ll do nothing. Why? Because there was no underhanded trick to Allura and I coming together.”
“How can you stand to do anything with a smarmy, self serving bastard like him?!” Keith’s eyes were blazing with fury, his question a sharp accusation. “How can you stand to even be touched by him?”
“I…” She fell silent, Allura not knowing how to answer his question. “He’s my husband…” She repeated lamely, hearing Keith snort.
“Well, I guess you don’t need me then, do you?” He wanted to know, causing Allura to shake her head fitfully.
“I’m not saying that!”
“Captain, you are agitating my wife.” Lotor interrupted, trying to back himself and Allura into the hotel room. “I’ll politely ask you to leave.”
“Fine. I was just going anyway.” Keith retorted, and with one last scorching stare at Allura, he turned his back on them.
“Keith…” She said his name softly, sadly.
“Let him go Allura.” Lotor advised her, succeeding in pulling her back into the room. “He needs to cool down. Anything else you say to each other will only serve to further hurt you.” It was sound advice, and something Allura wasn’t expecting from Lotor.
“Why would you care?” She asked, crossing her arms over her chest, using her hands to rub warmth on her bare arms. “Wouldn’t it serve you better for Keith and I to be at each other’s throats?”
“I suppose it would.” Lotor agreed, closing the door. “But I don’t like seeing you in pain.” His footsteps sounded, Lotor drawing near to her. “And talking to Keith was painful. I could see it in your eyes, how much it distressed you.” She felt his fingers touch the middle of her back, Lotor doing an idle caress up her spine. Allura immediately stepped forward, shivering as she avoided his touch.
Lotor did not comment on her pulling away from him, merely standing there watching her as she moved around the room. “From what you told the captain, I take it this time you remember what happened between us?”
She glanced at him out the corner of her eye, doing a slight nod. “And you?” She asked, toes brushing against one of the fallen pillows. “Do you remember as well?”
“I do.” Lotor smiled, his voice a seductive purr. “Each and every exquisite moment.”
Allura blushed, feeling awkward and uneasy, kneeling down to pick up the pillows off the floor. “That wasn’t me…” She began, lifting one to balance on her lap. “I…I don’t normally act like that.”
“You just had one too many things to drink.” Lotor told her, and she frowned, turning to look at him.
“To drink?” Allura was confused, thinking back to their dinner. Remembering the delicious fruit drink she had so enjoyed. “I stayed away from alcohol.”
Lotor fixed her with a bewildered look, the prince shaking his head no. “Allura, the peach snappler IS a drink laden with alcohol.”
“What?” She gasped, dropping the pillows back on the floor.
She blindly grabbed at a pillow, jerking it off the floor, her upset making her shake. She had drank something full of liquor, in one fell swoop breaking her vow to never drink again. What’s more she had had several glasses, and on an all but empty stomach! Now her behavior for this day came with startling clarity, Allura realizing why she had acted the way she had. It was all the fault of the peach snappler, clouding her judgment, and making her looser in her affections towards Lotor.
Furiously, she grabbed another pillow, piling it up on top of her lap. Lotor’s shadow fell on her, but she didn’t look up at him. “You’re upset.” He noted, slowly kneeling down besides her. She said nothing, grabbing a third pillow, Lotor handing her the fourth that was in his range. She took it from him without commenting, Allura rising to stand at the same time Lotor did. “Why?”
“Why?” Allura stepped towards the bed, seeing the rumpled sheets that were moved enough to reveal the mattress beneath them. “How can you ask me that?!” She angrily flung the pillows onto the bed, then walked past Lotor to fetch the bed sheet she had left on the floor. She gave an angry jerk of the fabric, lifting it off the floor to bunch it up against her chest.
Lotor stood where she had left him, his expression wary, eyes cautious as he watched her stalk back towards the bed. “I thought you knew.” He began, falling silent when she left out an angry huff of air. “Allura, I truly thought you knew that drink had alcohol in it. I thought you wanted to indulge yourself.”
“Like the night we got married?” She dumped the sheet on the bed, and began trying to smooth it out, a half feeble attempt at making the bed look presentable.
“Lotor….” She whirled to look at him, hands still touching the blanket. “That wasn’t me last night….that…that was a drunken caricature of who I am.”
“I know.” He said, expression serious.
“It can’t happen again.” Allura added, locking eyes with him. “The drinking and the sex….” He held back his disappointment, just waiting for her to finish. “I’m not ready to have that kind of relationship with you.”
“When will you be able to?” Lotor asked, and she looked down, spotting another pillow on the floor.
“I honestly don’t know…” Allura told him, walking towards the pillow. “Maybe….when I…I come to…”
“To love me?” He supplied in her silence.
“Maybe. Love is important but so is trust.” Allura picked up the pillow, and saw that beneath it, was the crumpled remains of her panties. She went to grab them, and her eyes grew wide to see how shredded the silk fabric was, bearing long lines from Lotor’s nails. She fisted them into a ball, flinging the pillow in the direction of the bed. It fell short, Lotor moving to catch it.
“I remember…” Allura said, heading towards the waste basket. “You stopped me from drinking any more than I did. You were sober enough to know I shouldn’t drink anymore…..but…I also realize you had to know enough to know what happened next was wrong.” She dropped her ruined panties into the basket, and turned to look at him. “You should have held back. You shouldn’t have let me throw myself at you. Lotor…you should have stopped me!”
“You were pretty hard to resist.” Lotor told her, his words making her blush. “Not many men could resist such a passionate proposition. And I WAS inebriated too you know. I wasn’t exactly thinking my clearest.”
“Still….you could have tried….” She sighed, and began moving around the room, picking up the discarded halves of Lotor’s uniform. She had this need to see the room back in order, Allura neatly folding his tunic in half. “I’m not disappointed though.” Allura added.
“It’s only because you don’t expect better from me.” Lotor pointed out, and she looked away, embarrassed because he was right. “Allura, I vow to show you I can be good. That you can expect better of me. I only want to be worthy of you….”
“You do?” She set his clothing down on top of one of the chairs that were still upright, her eyes surprised.
He nodded. “I do.” He approached her, reaching to stand up the overturned chair for her. “Allura, I love you, and only want you to be able to return that love. This is why I am willing to go through such lengths for you. I’ve never felt like this for any other woman. Please believe me.”
She looked into his eyes, holding his hands, and sincerely wanted to believe in him. She supposed there was worse things than to be loved by him. So she nodded, and his smile blossomed on his face, his eyes happy. “Thank you Allura.” Lotor hugged her, Allura not tensing up in his embrace.
“Lotor….? Do you still not remember our wedding night?” He pulled back, and shook his head, and she sighed disappointed.
“What about you? Remember anything new?”
“Yes.” The blush was back on her cheeks, Allura fidgeting with the back of the chair. “I do. It’s mainly a lot of sex but….I saw us briefly at the chapel. And…well there was this building…”
“Did you get a name of this place?” He wanted to know.
“Alabaster.” She told him, surprised when his face showed his recognition of that name. “You know of it?”
“I do.” Lotor told her. “I can’t imagine you or your cousin going to that sort of establishment.”
“Is it really that bad?”
“Not bad. Just different.” Lotor said, smiling. “You would seem so out of place there….at least while sober.”
“I wish I could remember more.” She was frustrated, blinking at him as he tenderly brushed back the curls from her cheeks.
“I have an idea.” Lotor told Allura, smile widening. “There might be a way to jog your memory.”
“Well….it depends on you.” Lotor said, and Allura echoed his words.
“On me?” She was confused, wondering what he was getting at.
“Yeah. On how badly you want to remember.” She went silent at that, thinking it over. She did want to know, Allura feeling this was something that would torment her for the rest of her life if she didn’t get her memories back.
“Let’s do it.” Allura said, and Lotor laughed, looking delighted.
“All right, take a quick shower and get dressed.” Lotor told her. “It’s time we revisit at least one of the places we went to that night.” She nodded, not quite smiling, feeling nervous energy go through her. If they were lucky, maybe, just maybe her memory would be restored. Allura only hoped she could live with what she might learn!